touching base

Well what's been happening??

I've had good news and some bad news.....

The Bad:

My cousin unfortunately miscarried, she was 20 weeks and having a boy. Very sad, she had recently had a baby girl and was shocked and excited to find she was pregnant again but took it in her stride. In the mean time her partner, my aunt and her children lost there home also due to no work and the loss of her business a while ago. They are all moving interstate but not before she must arrange a heart breaking funeral for her baby boy.

My niece whom also recently tied the knot with one of the most frustrating men I know has been knocked off her butt as well. Her new husband quit/got sacked from the new job 'the husband' got for him. She has decided to interview for a new job that pays more (since she is the sole bread winner) but before that happened her paternal grandmother had a brain aneurysm and has passed away, the funeral being Monday this week.

The Good:

Well its always a good week when mum's home and not in the hospital. She was also admitted to the hospital the same weekend at the other grandmother, which she stayed for about a week but has been home for a week now.

My brother and his wife leave for the States tomorrow and gave us a call last night. Unusual so I stated to freak out when he said..... No need to panic but I wanted you to hear it from me.... I had to brace myself thinking that he knew something about my parents that I hadn't been told yet.... but to my surprise it wasn't....

He went on to say, well we know about your situation, and we didn't want you to hear this from someone else..... Cassie is pregnant! Cassie is my other niece. She is an only child so this is fantastic news for my brother and his wife. Cas has been married going on 2.5 years, she is 27 years of age and is so happily married it makes you sick. She and her husband have travelled the world since he works for one of our large airlines in engineering and I think they are going to be blessed and live a great life.

Well, I started writing this post on Friday morning and its now Saturday, been up since 6.15am and 1 thing has changed from above. Of course its mum, she is back in hospital. She has cellulitis in her right leg, they did think that it could have been another blood clot but it is believed now that it may be just the cellulitis. Thank goodness. I started to get frustrated yesterday when she went back into the hospital, they never seem to look at previous records. Mum was in hospital only the week before where they were trying to manage her pain but do you think that they wrote up her pain medication yesterday??/ No of course not, so had to make sure before I left last night that she would be comfortable.

You know the older they come the younger they seem. Strange isn't it. I feel like they are children again and I need to make sure that they are OK and that only I can make things better, like they have no voice for themselves or that they don't know direction any longer. I think its me, not them that needs to adjust and just back off sometimes.

Diet/lifestyle changes...
I have a friend who has taken on the Bodytrim system, her results, 19 kilo loss in 10 weeks. Sounds fantastic to me. On the little I have read of the book, it appears to be a high protein diet, much like the Durkin diet, first 3 days being protein only.... Thought I would give it a go, little trial so to speak.

Feelings

I got a text message the other night that I should be happy about but my feelings were ...... assaulted, battered, worn down, you get what I mean. What did it say?

"It's a boy and Lucas will be home this weekend a new baby brother for Olivia
and she is very excited"

Its not that I was not excited or happy for them but to be able to adopt 2 babies so quickly just did my head in when it seemed that someone deemed me not worthy of 1. I remember giving that person the advise, from IVF to adoption, and then they get through for the second time and we couldn't get through for the 1st time.

I feel like this time in LA is going to work and I feel like we are going to be blessed with twins, maybe a boy and a girl but I feel really lucky to have been given the opportunity to be a mother. I so feel like this is going to work. Am I crazy? I don't know, I like this kind of crazy.

Update

So a couple of things have gone down since I last updated.

Mum had another fall out of bed on Monday, thought she might of broken a hip, unluckily it turn out to be nothing, after the x-rays and having the physio help her work, she came home from the hospital. I took her dogs to the vet Tuesday, left one there for surgery, Wednesday did the pick up and took home back to mum's. By the time I got back she was on the phone with the hospital...... wait for it ..... they reviewed her x-rays, she does have a hairline break in her pelvis??

Oh that's why it hurts like f*ck!

Result, bed rest for the next few weeks. Fun for everyone around her, she does not stay in bed people!

A week ago I also had to take my Miss Becky to the vet also, she had developed a bit of a cough, I was just praying for no kennel cough, especially since we have to other dogs at home.

Well kennel cough would have been less expensive. Miss Becky has a heart murmur. That's right, on a scale of 1 to 6, she is a 4. Thank God, 5 and 6 are surgery. She will be on medication for the rest of her little life but at least I still have her. $120 per month for meds, I just try not to think of the cost over a 5 year span although I hope she will live forever.

My sister from another mother, Kerrie, has contacted me to advise that she has friends in America that can get accommodation for me cheaper, so just waiting to hear if the cost is less than my original quotes, not holding my breath but any saving is good for spending money ;)

I am on my weight loss journey still. Although I thought about doing the Master Cleanse, I have come to my senses and have changed my plans and will update with a new weight update in a week or two. Start weight is 91.5 on Friday 6th May. Although everyone thinks that I hold my weigh well and no one can see the weight on me, I can see it. I also just saw the professional photo's of my nieces wedding and those freakin fat arms are in them, not happy Jan, so have to start doing some light weights to fix that issue.

I fixed the sneaker issue by of course buying new shoes. I brought some Portland Get Fit Lift shoes, they are like the tone ups but the Aussie version I guess. I can tell you that they do make for some sore shins after a couple of days. But with the little peep hole in the top, it helped with the tattoo.