transition

Transition

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Local Celebrity

So the news is out.

A local magazine is going to do a 4 part series on the husband and I about our trip and resulting bub (fingers crossed).

I thought, OK, this is OK, but now they want to come over and take photo's of the husband and I, now that feels hard.

I got through the probing questions about the start of our relationship, when I realised there was a problem with our fertility, went through all of our testing and procedures. It was feeling really hard for a while there, nearly wanted to pull the plug, but pushed through.

I am a little freaked out that there will be a photographer in my home tomorrow.

On better new, mum will be released from rehab on Tuesday, that sounds wrong doesn't it, released, sounds like she is getting out of jail or substance rehab.

So not sure if I told you that I had my hair all cut off? Well I did, and now it also is a different colour, I have gone lighter, it will be even lighter by the time I head to the States. Its funny because of the photo shoot, I had originally given the magazine a photo of my long dark hair, which was curled for my nieces wedding. I thought I was smart because then no one would recognise me in the magazine, but now they will get current photo's, not happy Jan :(

So, there is 27 days until we leave! Its now coming really quickly and really becoming a reality....

I'm still a bit perplexed about what to take with us, don't know whether to bring allot of clothes or not, since I might want to buy some clothes in the States, whether to bring much in the way of shampoo and conditioner, since it will weigh allot in our cases to bring enough toiletries for 5 weeks, I think I will just bring a small bottle of each and buy the rest in the States. All these little things is what is swimming in my head at the moment.

My body also is giving me some grief. If your a guy, this is where you stop reading.

I am on the pill to get my cycle where the clinic needs it. In doing so, I am skipping a period and continuing to take the active pills. Well my body is saying, no, I want to give you this period, you must take it. So at the moment, I am suffering the cramps but to date, no period as yet.

I don't know if this has been the same experience that others have had, would be interesting tohear from anyone reading who has gone through similar experience.

Well have to go for now, well check back maybe after the photo shoot tomorrow. EEEERK

5 weekends

That's all we have until our trip!

It is amazing, I can't believe how fast its moving. We have booked all of our hotels, the last one changed to a Hollywood hotel. I am so nervous about flying, not looking forward to that side of it but I am excited about the food I have read on allot of menus.

Last night I went out and got my hair colour changed and had the chop. That should make for interesting customs conversation trying to get out of Australia and into LAX.

I guess the count down will start soon, I will have to make some lists, start getting things together for our cases.

I have been really stressed about work, my mother, the trip and 'the husbands' business. All things are getting better but I can't help but try to control everything. I know that I can't be everything to everyone but this is what I have been in a long time, its hard to stop.

Well I have the in laws coming for Indian tonight, will drop some off to mum as well, she loves Indian food. Mum has moved over to rehab now, she has been there for about 6 days now, not sure exactly how long she will be there for, but as long as she can start to walk by herself and get some of her Independence back again, it will be worth it.

My dogs have all had their won issues as well, Becky's heart murmer is getting worse, I have her on up to 5 tablets a day, now I have started to cook and give her low sodium food in a hope that it will help, it doesn't appear to be helping yet :( Molly had issues with her ears, lucky the medication fixed it, we thought she may have had to undergo surgery but lucky she didn't. Humphrey, well he has been Humphrey, no issues really to speak of with him, luck is on my side with him :)

Well better make a move to get this place ready for the in laws.

Nothing new but nothing old either

I'm finding it difficult to remove blogs from my blog list, even those that haven't blogged in months. Sometimes is just too hard to let go, like Big Al or Polar's Mom.... I keep hoping that they will come back but they still don't seem to be anywhere, maybe they have gotten on with their real lives??

I have finally started to prepare for our trip to the States. Since I am travelling all the way to another country, I didn't want to leave anything to chance, so I have started the Pill a month early. God I hate the Pill, it makes me feel blah, sick, blah. So I am taking it at night and hoping I can get through the most of it through my sleep. Its not working.

I have been really stressed of late. The Husband is now working for himself full time from home. It is soo hard to leave every day knowing he is still in bed and is home all day while I'm at a work place :(

Work has been stressing me. Its been really busy because we have been short of staff and I am having to help where I don't want to be, making me angry :(

Mum is still in the hospital, that is taking its toll on me, mentally and physically :(

But did you know that there is only 44 days until we fly out to LA :)

The Husband has started dreaming about us having twins, a boy and a girl. He then goes on to tell me that as soon as the babies are born, I want to go back for more treatment/babies!! Can you even imagine?? I told you we have great vibes about this treatment :)

My new bathing suit has arrived and I am very excited. We are still looking into things to do while we are there, The Husband would like to travel to NYC to attend Ground Zero and pay our respects, however we have to fit in with the clinic so these things might have to be looked at once we arrive and get a schedule set in stone.

Anywho, best be making a move, I'm meant to be at work, doing work stuff ;)

nothing really to title this as...

As per usual, I am back and forth to the hospital, mum got so sick this time so suddenly that she was blinded, literally blinded. She had gotten up in the morning to go to the toilet and could no longer see! By the time she got to the hospital, she had NO blood pressure at all. Once they got her stabilised, she spent a few days in ICU, went to a unit within the hospital however her breathing again got really laboured, nearly went back to ICU, but mum resisted so they dealt with her in the unit. Blood sugars continued to drop every day, one ICU nurse told me that its concerning that her body might be shutting down. It is still hard for me to believe because she is still talking to me.

I am still the point of contact so everyone is calling/txting me to find out what is happening, I just want to shout that if people went to see her, they would know how she is. I work full time but still manage to see her every day. They don't call her because they would prefer her direct number which I can't give them, its obviously to hard to call through reception.

I am really worried that one of these days, coming soon will be the end. I don't know what will be worse, her going before we leave for the US, or something happening while we are in the US, what will I do without her in my life. She is my best friend. 'The Husband' has even asked me if I want to be told if something happens while we are away. I don't know how to answer that question.

Weight loss is not happening, I don't have enough hours/minutes in the day to be thinking about what I am or not eating, allot of the time its just take out on the way home from the hospital.

'The Husband' is no longer employed, causing me more stress, he is basically working for himself however it doesn't make me feel secure. I'm worried about our trip to the US, will we have enough cash. I just don't know anymore. I am visualising our trip, I can see it, I can taste it but do I really believe we will be there?? Yes and No.

Its been a while

I can't believe its nearly been a month since I updated.

Oops, sorry, how neglectful of me.

I am getting extremely excited for our trip, the days are counting down very quickly, 64 days until we fly out to LA.

'The Husbands' home business is cranking along, so much he can hardly keep up, she is continuing to hint that he might have to give up his full time job. I will resist for as long as I can. I just don't trust that the second shoe might drop and he ends up with no work at all.

My job has been very busy. I am getting extremely frustrated with some of my co worker, some of them are so slack and I have to pick up the slack allot. I had to let my team leader know today how I was getting frustrated. It just wasn't fair to myself.

We have been contacted by our clinic for our doctors clinic in the States, 2.15pm on the day we arrive in LA. Nothing like getting the ball rolling. LOL

So that's about it, not much to update really.

I am still wanting to loose some weight before heading over but sometimes its easier to say than do. I would love to lose 2 kilos per week but 1 per week would be great too.

Any way, this is it, I'm done, got to get the cake out of the oven, ok the diet can be after the cake.

touching base

Well what's been happening??

I've had good news and some bad news.....

The Bad:

My cousin unfortunately miscarried, she was 20 weeks and having a boy. Very sad, she had recently had a baby girl and was shocked and excited to find she was pregnant again but took it in her stride. In the mean time her partner, my aunt and her children lost there home also due to no work and the loss of her business a while ago. They are all moving interstate but not before she must arrange a heart breaking funeral for her baby boy.

My niece whom also recently tied the knot with one of the most frustrating men I know has been knocked off her butt as well. Her new husband quit/got sacked from the new job 'the husband' got for him. She has decided to interview for a new job that pays more (since she is the sole bread winner) but before that happened her paternal grandmother had a brain aneurysm and has passed away, the funeral being Monday this week.

The Good:

Well its always a good week when mum's home and not in the hospital. She was also admitted to the hospital the same weekend at the other grandmother, which she stayed for about a week but has been home for a week now.

My brother and his wife leave for the States tomorrow and gave us a call last night. Unusual so I stated to freak out when he said..... No need to panic but I wanted you to hear it from me.... I had to brace myself thinking that he knew something about my parents that I hadn't been told yet.... but to my surprise it wasn't....

He went on to say, well we know about your situation, and we didn't want you to hear this from someone else..... Cassie is pregnant! Cassie is my other niece. She is an only child so this is fantastic news for my brother and his wife. Cas has been married going on 2.5 years, she is 27 years of age and is so happily married it makes you sick. She and her husband have travelled the world since he works for one of our large airlines in engineering and I think they are going to be blessed and live a great life.

Well, I started writing this post on Friday morning and its now Saturday, been up since 6.15am and 1 thing has changed from above. Of course its mum, she is back in hospital. She has cellulitis in her right leg, they did think that it could have been another blood clot but it is believed now that it may be just the cellulitis. Thank goodness. I started to get frustrated yesterday when she went back into the hospital, they never seem to look at previous records. Mum was in hospital only the week before where they were trying to manage her pain but do you think that they wrote up her pain medication yesterday??/ No of course not, so had to make sure before I left last night that she would be comfortable.

You know the older they come the younger they seem. Strange isn't it. I feel like they are children again and I need to make sure that they are OK and that only I can make things better, like they have no voice for themselves or that they don't know direction any longer. I think its me, not them that needs to adjust and just back off sometimes.

Diet/lifestyle changes...
I have a friend who has taken on the Bodytrim system, her results, 19 kilo loss in 10 weeks. Sounds fantastic to me. On the little I have read of the book, it appears to be a high protein diet, much like the Durkin diet, first 3 days being protein only.... Thought I would give it a go, little trial so to speak.