not around much

I'm sorry I haven't been blogging lately. I think I've been a bit depressed about the whole adoption process.

You see they have 'suspended' our assessment because it seems they don't like it when you have a bad memory. That's not bad memories but a bad memory. I can't tell a 'fluid' history story for them so their answer is to send me to counselling to see if I have any suppressed memories, maybe I was traumatised as a child ad they want to get it out. Or maybe I just have a BAD MEMORY! Also because we had moved away from my dad's family so I don't know allot about them and dad doesn't talk about them and doesn't like to talk about it, it appears to be a problem for me as I don't know enough family history. God this is frustrating. And the last stupid reason for the suspension. Dazza smokes. That's right, he smokes, it appears not the smokers are the minority, although it is legal its still a no no for the 'government' department that does adoption in Australia.

Now I got a call yesterday from the head of the department advising of a counsellor that they want to use but I will have to pay for the session and they will met the cost of the report that will b issued. The cost, $90 per hour. I don't mind the cost really just that I think it will be a waste of time because there is nothing wrong with me. I questioned if I could claim it o my health insurance an the Head almost fell off her seat. Why is that a wrong question, you want me to pay for something that in my opinion is a waste but I am happy to do it if it gets us further in the process, they should be happy that we pay for private health insurance.

I think I left her a bit put off but its my life they are fucking with. They are stopping me form having a family, its not bad enough that God decided that we shouldn't be blessed with babies but now some government department can stop me with these ridiculous reasons. I would understand if they said something about my families criminal connections but they just cal that a 'colourful history' which I have o remind her that it was my families 'colourful history' not mine as I have not taken part in anything criminal or even associated with the part of the family that is in the 'underworld' but again apparently they have shaped me even though I haven't seen them personally since I was a child.

So instead of telling them were to go, which I was really tempted to do yesterday, we have decided that we are going to think outside of the box they have put us in and continue with I* V* F as well which is a no no.

Dazza sees to have settled down on the health issues as well, just waiting for the hospital appointments for both operations, maybe before the end of the year but no more attacks of the gallbladder as yet, touch wood.

As for work, I now have 2 jobs, I am working a part time office temp in the freight and transport industry as well as a part time (3 shifts per fortnight) at a ladies fashion retail store. I have never done that before but it should be fun except or the shop lifters...............