What a week!

Hi everyone, sorry I haven't been a good blog participant in the past week or so, I will try really hard this week to read whats been going on because I really feel like I have missed lots of whats been going on in your lives. Yeah Kek for the big move into the rental!

So my week thus far in the new job. Well as we are still in training it hasn't been to bad however there has been some hiccups. As you all know with the change of jobs I have stayed in the same industry but allot of the new staff are completely new to the industry. I sometimes feel like I shouldn't speak in the class as I don't want others to think that I am trying to take over or answer for the trainer, I had even mentioned this to a couple of the others in the class just in case they were feeling this way. But low and behold, it happened yesterday and I felt like the tiniest person on earth. One of the guys in the class, strange man at best, mentioned in front of everyone that when he asks a question that he wants only the trainer to answer even though he appreciates that we all bring our 'own' experiences to the job! Well I could feel myself go red and eyes on me. I really wanted to get up and walk out and never go back but I stayed. I then mentioned to the trainer after lunch that I hoped that she didn't think I was taking over but I too had to clarify in my mind the job as it is different from my old company. I also advised that I DO want to be there at this company and not the old one. She assured me that she ran that room, not him, and that she appreciated my input.

Once we started again, the whole group listening and participating, he asked a question again and someone from behind him went to answer and he stopped her in her tracks with 'I'm asking our trainer'. Well, I think he just ended every friendship he may have had in the room. How he is to work as a team in the future I have no idea as no one wants to help him or talk to him.

Anyway, for our next interesting installment in the strange man, during the week he was late back to class with another team member who is a visitor to this country. They came back half an hour late telling us that they lost track of time as they found they had a lot in common about a Bangladesh poet and he could tell us all about it to if we wanted! Hello, you are interrupting the class as we are learning a new computer system. Man what an idiot. They were told to stay behind after class and he couldn't understand what he had done wrong. The next day our visitor from another country was asked to stay behind again and then the following day I didn't expect to see him again because of his tardiness but low and behold, there he was on Friday. However by morning tea he was gone. Apparently lead away by a very 'official' looking person. Its seems we have a problem with our visa, or lack there of it! Think we may need to visit him in a detention centre somewhere.

So here I am at home, still obsorbing all that happened and my new found friends, from many walks of life which I will have to tell you about later. I have a really sore mouth that I think is from eating a pie LAST Sunday which was too hot, it seems to have blistered and ulserated and is hurting like hell.

New Job

So you have probably wondering if I fell off the earth as I have been gone for a while. Well here I am. I left my old job on Friday, it was sad to see the end of that place but exciting that I can make a fresh start with better hours :-)

New job commenced on Monday, lots of new people from diverse back grounds. Not sure yet whether my experience in the energy industry will be a help or a hindrance as they do definitely have a different way of doing things. I am still in the mind space of us and them and unfortunately I am finding it hard to include myself in the them. But we will see how that goes, can't see why I wouldn't be happy.

On the weekend I was asked to groom 3 dogs for a work, ex work colleague, I was scared as this was my first paying customer! I only charged $50 for the 3 but nicked one of the dogs and because I panic, I got Dazza to take the dog to the vet, I don't know if they stitched just to satisfy the crazy lady on the phone, (that would be me!) but the puppy cot 2 stitches on the belly. $153.65 later and I was down $103.65 for the experience. But as Dazza says 'its all experience'. They weren't the easiest dogs to do, they were mattered and I don't know how often they are clipped but boy, fully hands on.

I haven't done much in the way of diet or exercise, especially after being ill the other week. I have mainly been having soups and finding that I am satisfied with just that, I know it's not the best diet but its all the head stress I feel I can cope with at the moment. Exercise consists of walking to the train station or bus stop and walking around the city daily so my incidental exercise has increased which is lucky because that's all my exercise at the moment. I've been quite tired but I am getting up much earlier and getting home later but it's good that Dazza picks me up on our way home.

Well that's it for me today, I have got to get ready for bed, 5.30am tomorrow, and everyday of the week....................

Well I did it

I resigned from work today as they wouldn't let me go back to the other level. I have already gotten myself another position with the position in a service capacity. So will be a bit happier.

So what else has happened? Dazza has also left his job and will be starting a new one on Thursday, also in the city so we can travel together as well so I am happy with that.

Anyway, still at work so better have a move.

I'm bored

So here I am again today in my "resting" faze of being ill. But I am bored shitless. I have Foxtel but after a week it is all the same. God I want to go back to work. I haven't heard from my team manager as yet and am trying to not take it as a bad sign. I'm thinking again!

I've read everyones blogs, looked at some others and its only 9.03AM, what am I going to do now. Dazza's in bed with the flu so he's no good to talk to, I'm too scared he'll breath on me anyway. Poor boy wants warmth in bed as he's so sick and all I say is 'roll the other way' so that he doesn't breath on me. I'm such a bitch but I don't need that illness too.

Well better go and find something to occupy my mind before I start to think again.

Thanks

You gals make me laugh with your comments, so its not just me with the mental attack? I got up this morning ignoring the crap feeling, ready to get on with the day, until it hit me again. You know I'm talking about the diarrhoea, I believe that it thought, well if you ain't thinking I'll have to show you instead! I have bit the bullet when calling work this morning and told them I want to go back to service instead of staying in sales. My team manager will talk to the sales manager and request this for me, going from her thoughts it will work out ok.

I told my mum today about the anti-depressants and no sooner did I arrive back home than my brother called to check on me. It seems that he had called her just after I left there today and she told him that I was down, not sure if she told him that I was on the meds but I thought, boy that's quick.

So now I'm waiting a call from my team manager to let me know what happened before I nick down to mum and dads again, its dad's 72nd birthday today. Keep your fingers crossed for me to not only go to service but that I get a good team manager.

I think I'm gunna ...........

I think I'm just gunna stop! You know after being sick yet again this week with the dreaded diarrhoea, (yes I did it again!) I have been home again just thinking. I have been told by Dazza many times that I over think every thing. He tells me, just stop thinking about it and just do it.

Today I went back to work, second guessing myself as to whether I was well enough and decided to go, I don't like the thought of people thinking that I'm slacking so I go and in the end, I just end up coming home again. I think to much. I don't call into work because I think that they will not like me. I go to work but think that I can't do this, so feel sorry for myself and get my butt sent home. I sit on the couch and think 'whats wrong with me?' I don't want another job, I do like my job, maybe the thought of having to get the sales is effecting me. I think that I won't get the sales, which makes me come up with excuses, maybe I am just not a 'sales' person. I don't think that they will let me go back to my old position, they have stated this before. But should I try anyway?

Today on the Tyra Show there was a 'diet' war, Dazza told me to turn it over as I am not on a diet anymore, he tells me I think to much about it! I'm sitting here thinking whether I should have soup for tea or wait for Dazza as he would want pizza and I can have a pasta................. to much thinking being had here.

I am going to come up with a new train of thought. I am no longer going to think about whether I am feeling well. I think I will just be. I will tell myself I am always well that way even if I am lying to myself, I will not second guess going to work. I know that second guessing myself is sometimes good especially if I have had diarrhoea all morning but for other times, I'm lying!

WTF?

Today my mum tells me that she has seen my niece again recently, where she decided to inform my mum that when she goes into labour she wants me there! I know we have been close and its bad to say, but she was always my favorite growing up and she did live with us for many years before running away for 3 years. But come on.

Mum tells her that she thinks its a bad idea and she's just, 'do you think' and looks at her boyfriend who says mmmmmmmmmm 'yeah, think about it', and I thought he was an idiot??

I guess I have to remember that she probably doesn't realise that I am upset, not actually at her but with the situation. I never do tell people that I am upset as I MUST always be the strong one, the one everyone else can come to for there problems. I'm the solver of others problems, just not my own and don't know what to do with my problems that I have no control over.

Maybe I should change the name of my blog to 'the biggest whinger?'